Thursday, July 21, 2011

Flying High

Life is amazing. More accurately, God is amazing. It never fails to amaze me that God is actually concerned about my life. And by concerned, I do not mean watching from a distance. Bette Midler may have incredible vocal ability, but her theology is seriously lacking. My God is intricately involved in every single aspect of my life, whether I see His hand moving or not. My God is like a composer...playing out every note, every possible modulation, every dynamic change, every harmony until the combination of random marks on a page is truly a masterpiece. Something that will make the world stop and take notice. Something that will tug at the heartstrings of His audience. A masterpiece that lets the world know He is real.

These past few months have been filled with some pretty significant life changes. I took a giant leap of faith. I felt God telling me to jump and I trusted Him. I argued with Him at first. I told Him He was crazy and apparently had no idea the severity of the economic climate in California. I told Him I had a good job that paid the bills and that I could go to daily without dread. Still He said, "Jump, Kristin. Trust Me and jump." So I did. As soon as I took the step off the edge, He brought confirmation that I was in the right place, that I heard His voice, that I was right where He wanted me to be. My God knows me well and understands how quickly doubt can creep in and suck the life out of all faith growing in my heart. I turned my notice into my job and immediately felt overwhelming peace. Quiet assurance that my God provides, that my God sees, that my God cares, and that my God has it all figured out.

Pretty soon after I put in my notice, I reconnected with an incredible guy that has completely captured my heart. A relationship was completely unexpected...something I wanted but did not see coming in the near future. I am overwhelmed and completely amazed...in all good ways. I turned 30. I've been told that the 30s are the best years. So far, I completely agree. I'm currently unemployed. My job let me go before I planned on leaving. This past Friday was my last day. Some may wonder why I'm not completely freaking out and stressed beyond belief. Frankly, I wonder as well. I feel like I should be stressing more. I should be more scared about the future. I should be absolutely freaking out. So many changes in such little time...yet the peace remains.

It was no surprise to God that my time at BBW was cut short. It is no surprise to God that the job market is not ideal right now. It is no surprise to Him that job searching completely overwhelms me. Nothing surprises Him. That is why I can sit here with peace. My God provides. My God sees. My God cares. My God has it all figured out.

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